I never realized how hurt Cas looks when Dean says that. Fuck.
#it’s that little pause before he laughs
and look at that breath he takes and how he sighs can we just
I know that feeling I’ve made that face, the pain of knowing that the only person you trust, the person who you have let in without any barriers is not truly yours.
By experience I can tell that Cas already knows about Future!Dean sleeping around but they don’t talk about it and if Cas can just forget about it everything will be okay, but it’s not okay, when past!Dean informs Cas about the sex habits of future!Dean Cas pauses because he remembers “Oh yeah Deans not mine, he hasn’t been in a long time” what hes been trying to forget.
I can just imagine the first time Cas finds hickeys on Future!Dean’s hips that are not from him, his pained expression and the realization of unfaithfulness, the bob of his adams apple. I Imagine Cas pushing down his feelings because at this point Future!Dean isn’t visiting him as often and though he would have liked to keep believing that Future!Dean was just busy with keeping everyone safe the hickeys don’t lie that Future!Dean had shared something that he thought was so special at first with someone else, but Instead of getting angry he just dismisses all the pain because he still needs Future!Dean so badly and if Cas can just ignore Future!Dean’s other lovers when Future!Dean is keeping Cas’s bed warm (Future!Deans not there often enough to call it their bed anymore) and keep himself high when Future!Dean is keeping someone else’s bed warm then he’ll be okay he’ll be dead inside but he’ll be okay.